to do...

Every day I get new ideas of things I want to do. So I am no starting an official to do list on here. I will continue adding to it, probably in different posts. For now:

• take photography class
• get a good camera after that photography class
• buy a French press
• work through my recipe books
• take piano lessons

in the making..

Okay. So I've been writing and making cards for years. Just recently I started taking pictures of the cards I've made. Here's some. Now we just past Valentine's day, so therefore all the hearts..

Our lives our in God's hands

scrapbook heart, on pink card with brown card
stock strip and fibery paper (I forget the name, it looks
almost like fabric and is soft to the touch.) 

I received a gift a couple of years ago, wrapped in pretty
paper with roses. Okay, I admit, I safe ribbons, wrapping
paper, ribbons, everything and anything. So...
(And that fibery paper underneath)

Scrapbook paper heart and pink ribbon

fabric <3 and navy ribbon with red polka dots
(the fabric also appears in my quilt that I may have or may
still post about)

light blue fabric heart and <3 ribbon from my moms
'do you want to have this' box when I went home this
Christmas

Maybe you'll receive one of these cards in the near future. I did recently mail some of these. Surprise, you'll recognize them then, perhaps.
Eh and don't mock me for collecting little knick-knacks. (how in the world do you spell that) It comes in super handy, when you have no money and want to make cards, or when you want to be creative, and don't have many supplies. If you do have card making supplies and don't want them, feel free to safe them for me, I love it all! :D

I know.. I need to think of something different than hearts... It will come to me. I promise.

the day I made a recipe book

For quite a few years I had been collecting recipes. Whenever I found a good recipe in a magazine I would rip it out and save it in a folder. Maybe my view of recipes is odd, but I tend to hoard them thinking I'll have time and money and need to make all the yummy things...
Back in Alberta I had this box with many file folders, one was exploding, so overfull of recipes. I was frustrated, could never find that one recipe and it was just annoying to have it in the basement in a box in a folder...

ugly black binder :(

Last August on one of Lianne (my sister) and my many ventures we ended up at Dollarama. Love the place! :D Everything is so cheap, and they have so much fun stuff. I was just looking for a cool binder, you know with a fun cover. Well they had none! It was August (*school starts soon!) and there were no fun binders. We were both frustrated. We just wanted a recipe binder. Was that too much to ask.

Lianne's pretty placemat

Okay, we'll just leave then, and go to Staples or something, buy a binder, you know, then we're set. Until will walked past the place- ''mats. *thanks mom, for teaching me to think of 'plan Bs', so that I don't give up when plan I doesn't work*. Light bulb moment... :D

ruler, Stanley knife to the rescue

 I now must thank my Mom. She is BRILLIANT. Super creative. And Lianne. Goodness she thinks logical. The two together, well let's just say they are excellent at problem solving. So I saw the place-mats and bought one, bought an ugly 1" binder, and went home. Kind of happy. Kind of not happy. Kind of excited, but already flustered by the up coming process of trying to make this recipe binder. Which probably would not turn out the way I had envisioned.

make the cuts (use binder cover page as 'stencil'

make sure you don't make it too wide, other wise the
'window' on the binder rips (or byebye binder)

cutting the spine was a little tricky, since it's so narrow (the
spine window did rip a bit on mine when I was putting
it in.. O well)

put all the pieces in the cover..

 When I went through all those steps, Lianne went through the same steps as I did, we both had our very own very unique recipe binder.
For a couple of nights Lianne was busy typing out the recipes while I made 'subject dividers'. I was trying to find some colour that worked with the black/white damask that I had for my cover. At our house we have lots of craft supply, and I found some orange cardstock!! :D Love CARDSTOCK! So I ended up using the orange, not sure what Lianne used.
We had bought some page covers at Dollarama also (I think I bought 10 packs of 10 (?) but had to go back to get more.

front pocket

cover page... :D (we always said awesome
pawsome...)

I'm bad, ran out of page protectors, and out of time
in the last while, that this is in the front pocket
and whole punched

one of many recipes in my binder..
I just realized I haven't made this yet. 

mainly chocolate and baking recipes
in this section

ongoing debate that COOKIES should
be called bakies because technically
they're not cooked but baked

breakfast recibpes like muffins etc

Some of the other divider pages are, in this order...
- BREAKY (breakfast is so cliché)                                  
- MIDEATS (lunch items etc.)
- ZUPPS (O common you can guess)
- INDULGENCCES
- MISC (Jam, syrup, applesauce etc.)
- BAKIES
- SWEET 'N' SALTY (baking/homemade breads, and the like)
- NIBBLE 'N' MUNCH (trailmix etc.)

It was lots of fun making these, and now my binder is almost too full. So what's we gonna do..?

Well I was at Dollarama again yesterday (There's 3 within 5minutes!! :) Don't worry I've only been a couple of times), and was looking for a cool black 2 inch binder, or perhaps 3 inch. Even if it were ugly, I'd be okay  with that. But they had none. I'll keep my eye out.

For more recipes. And a 'fatter' binder.

I just wanted to know...

"...And lead me not into temptation..."
~Matt. 6:13~

Okay. I've given up. 

Well not really. But have realized I should probably not go some places at some times. Yesterday, after work at three, I had to run a couple of errands. I could use some food, my stomach was growling. However, what happened was I didn't need anything. There is enough food at the dorm for me, and since I'm the only one at the dorm this week I did not need to go anywhere to get more.

FORTINOS. It's a grocery story in the Loblaw's franchise thing. It's name is all uppercase. Like it's calling you over. Yelling your name. HELLO, OVER HERE. IT'S FORTINOS. COME IN. Well, I had not yet been at that particular Fortinos. Not shopped there yet. And I was kinda hungry. So...

Okay I find myself parking my car in the parking lot. Grab my purse, lock the doors and walk into Fortinos. I feel like an idiot. Walk around aimlessly. Checking every isle to find something yummy. I think people look at me, since I stare at each product, pick it up, look at it and then put it back. I have no cart. I have no basket. Fine, I'll get something. Eh the Rice Cakes are on sale. Perfect, and its even the good quality brand, costing the same as the NoName brand. Score.. O shit. I just grabbed something I did not need.

Only minutes later I don't feel so much like an idiot any more. I have a basket, and it's filling up... I see the produce section, o boy do I love produce... Yummy fruits and veggies... And then last but not least I find this orchid. It's only $15...and I have wanted it for a long time. I kind of deserve it...I mean I'm by myself at the dorm, and need a pretty companion to get me through these dreary winter days....

Then I get to the till. The cashier tells me how much it costs and I am surprised. I pay and drive to the dorm. When I get there I realize that I led myself into temptation. Grocery stores and me, well lets just say it's not a good combination. Especially not when I am hungry, don't need anything, and don't really have money for it. I was led into temptation, even though I remember praying very consciously yesterday 'and lead me not into tempation..' Why God? Why did I go? Why can't I resist temptations like grocery stores....

While thinking that I heard myself come up with excuses. Well I had never been in that Fortinos before and I just wanted to know what it looked like. I just wanted to know if it is cheaper or more expensive then Sobeys. I just.....

I'm just BSing myself while coming up with the excuses. I know the excuses I come up with are partially true. But I totally lied to myself about it...

So now I've lied and given into temptation...

Many times when we're faced with temptations we come up with excuses. I find that in the past it was often an excuse that included "I just wanted to know" in the excuse. I have been led astray that way many times. Just because I wanted to know... what it was like.. how it was.. what it looked like.. how I would feel.. what would happen....

I just wanted to know...

Now I know, just like many sources say, to not go to a grocery store on an empty(er) stomach. And maybe I should not go to the grocery store alone. Plus if I do have to go I must make a list of things I need and not go past that list. I think Ill be better of that way. Hopefully.

And pray often, for strength and self-control, so that I will not be led into temptation. again. and again. and again.

.w.r.i.t.e.

I am looking for answers..!

Goodness, they call it reading break. Before reading break started I had some very stressful, very hectic and busy weeks. It was chaotic, intense and crazy. There were a two consecutive days, with an essay, a sketchbook, and three midterms due or to do. It was nuts..
And then you have reading break. Glorious. Beautiful. Time off...
O wait! They recommend you read. Read tons. Work ahead. Start things that aren't due till, oh say mid March or early April. (Who's the crazy one?!) Don't they call it reading break, like a BREAK from reading?

Reading on the West Coast one summer... :D
now that was a break! 

Know what.. I don't get this. When you walk through the grocery store, or the Market at Redeemer, or any place where they sell fruit and vegetables they 'fresh' produce or something like that. Now I've been trying to see where my food is coming from. The other day I was buying bell peppers from Mexico!!! Frick, Mexico are we for real people? I worked in a greenhouse just this Christmas that grew peppers, and that's in our own country!!! Oh, and then the FRESH strawberries, from California.. How fresh can they be.. Were they picked like four days ago and that's why they're bruised, mushy, and not fresh? How about the U-Picks with strawberries here? Oh and don't strawberries grow in greenhouses here? Then there's these bags of frozen fruit we have in our freezer.... The frozen fruit brand 'Europe's Best' has strawberries, raspberries, and mixed frozen fruit... It says Europe in the brand name.. And they are all products from Chili!!! CHILI for Pete's sake.. Even the grapes are from Chili.. Guys that's South America!!! Like what in the world.. Wait -- where in the world do we live do we want to get our food from on demand?
Mini-carrots are product from the USA... That could be close by, I mean the US is ~2hrs from here, so not too bad. But they could be from Montana or Texas, that's not exactly close by.
The blueberries I just ate - they're fresh and cool right.. they're from Cali too. And the orange from Florida, the Pineapple from who knows where...
I LOVE FRUIT! Don't get me wrong. I LOVE VEGETABLES and if I could would eat them all day everyday. But really. Does it need to come from Mexico, California, Florida, Brasil, Chili?
At least the cucumber was from ON Canada, and the eggs were from inside this province as well. But seriously.. How far will we go to get our food..? How much money are we willing to spend, how much fuel burned in the planes to get food on our tables...? Is there a way to eat closer to home(if that makes sense)

WATCH THE VIDEO!
AND THINK ABOUT IT.. WHERE DO YOU LIVE?
WHERE DOES YOUR FOOD COME FROM? 

I know it's hard but just think about it.. please!

Also.. I went to buy some stuff at the Shoppers (drugstore/pharmacy) and found two of the same products right beside each other. Same brand, same product. O wait. Different price. Face cosmetic pads (you know those white round disk shape things to remove make-up with...) anyways.. the one kind was made with organic cotton. I checked the packaging - contents: 100% organic cotton. I checked the one that did not have organic on it, so the regular. It had no contents apparently. The non-organic were $4.29/pack of 80, the organic was $4.79/pack of 80. I bought the organic. I hope it's better for the environment, for the earth. I hope it is actually greener, like the packaging implies with it's green colour ink printed on the yucky plastic...

Organic Cotton

Have you ever realized how large packaging is for small products? The other day someone in my house was eating chicken wings. The box was on the the counter, it was at least 10x7x5 inch. It pissed me off. There were 12 chicken wings, inside a bag, inside this huge box that wasn't even half full. Like - Do we want to make it look like there's more food in it? Can we not use less cardboard? Or only plastic? Why two wrappings for one product? Same with cereal, crackers, KD (btw.. I DO NOT EAT KRAFT DINNER!). And when you buy a bag of chips it's only 2/3 filled. Or M&Ms and the like.. Like what are we doing? Making it seem like there's more in the bag than there actually is. I THINK WE'RE MISUSING OUR RESOURCES. NOT BEING GOOD STEWARDS. LYING TO OURSELVES AND THE REST OF THE WORLD. PRETENDING. 

Cereal in a bag in a box

HELLO!! WAKE UP!! WE'RE IN THE REAL WORLD. 

STOP PRETENDING! GET REAL!

PS. can someone tell me what Dutch Cocoa is? I see it everywhere on recipes. I have never heard of cocoa beans in the Netherlands. I had never heard of Dutch cocoa until I got to N-America.

Dutch Cocoa

reinvent the wheel...?

Why would I re-invent the wheel? Whoever did invent it made life easier for many who came after, and still now we are benefit greatly from that invention.
David, a psalmist and king, in the Bible wrote many psalms, hymns and beautiful songs. He wrote in times of joy and in times of sorrow. In times of thankfulness and in times of need. He wrote as cried out to God and as he shouted praise. He too wrote a song that fits my situation, a cry out to the Lord, for Him to teach me His paths, as I trust in Him and wait. So why should I go through reinventing a song, a prayer like this when it is ready for me to use?

Psalm 25

Teach Me Your Paths

    ^[a] Of David.

 ¹ To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul. 

² O my God, in you I trust; 

   let me not be put to shame; 

   let not my enemies exult over me. 

³ Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame; 

   they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

 ⁴ Make me to know your ways, O LORD; 

   teach me your paths. 

⁵ Lead me in your truth and teach me, 

   for you are the God of my salvation; 

   for you I wait all the day long.

 ⁶ Remember your mercy, O LORD, and your steadfast love, 

   for they have been from of old. 

⁷ Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; 

   according to your steadfast love remember me, 

   for the sake of your goodness, O LORD!

 ⁸ Good and upright is the LORD; 

   therefore he instructs sinners in the way. 

⁹ He leads the humble in what is right, 

   and teaches the humble his way. 

¹⁰ All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, 

   for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.

 ¹¹ For your name's sake, O LORD, 

   pardon my guilt, for it is great. 

¹² Who is the man who fears the LORD? 

   Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose. 

¹³ His soul shall abide in well-being, 

   and his offspring shall inherit the land. 

¹⁴ The friendship^[b] of the LORD is for those who fear him, 

   and he makes known to them his covenant. 

¹⁵ My eyes are ever toward the LORD, 

   for he will pluck my feet out of the net.

 ¹⁶ Turn to me and be gracious to me, 

   for I am lonely and afflicted. 

¹⁷ The troubles of my heart are enlarged; 

   bring me out of my distresses. 

¹⁸ Consider my affliction and my trouble, 

   and forgive all my sins.

 ¹⁹ Consider how many are my foes, 

   and with what violent hatred they hate me. 

²⁰ Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! 

   Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. 

²¹ May integrity and uprightness preserve me, 

   for I wait for you.

 ²² Redeem Israel, O God, 

   out of all his troubles.

let's write some more

I have no idea what to write. My brain is a mess.
Full of thoughts. Like a maze perhaps, and why?
Maybe because I cannot get it all straightened out. It is just all over, a jungle of thoughts, of ideas, opinions, views. And to sort it all. Boy. There are so many influences around me. So much new information coming all the time. So much to chew on.

Right now that's a bit overwhelming. I am not sure how I'm going to sort it all out. I know I must trust. I know God's here for me. He's been carrying me through this rough patch. Which is absolutely wonderful and I am so grateful for. Without God I would not know what to do.

He's here for me, in times of trouble. When I cry out He is already right beside me. When I start sliding prevents me from slipping. When I slip He is there to catch me. So thankful for God's provisions and His care!