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"There is a time for everything,
   and a season for every activity under
the heavens:"
~Eccl. 3:1~

I have been back in Canada for a week and a half now. It has been good to be back so far. But when I was in the Netherlands I was really struggling with returning to Canada. I had enjoyed myself so much and just had a great time, also learned so much and had met new people who/and had new experiences that taught me many new things. I feel like in three weeks alone in the Netherlands I have grown in many ways, and it has been a blessing.

Anyway, so I left the Netherlands on the 16th. On the 15th was the first time that I actually seriously thought about packing my suitcases, and starting to say goodbye. I had seen some people only once, others multiple times, but most people I didn't see for long periods of time. It was easy to say 'goodbye' to those I hadn't seen much or only for a couple of hours. Others though that I stayed with longer, and that I have a -we-go-way-back- relationship with it was very difficult.
When I thought on Friday the 15th that I had to go home the next day I realized that I didn't want to go. I realized that I wasn't 'done' in Holland yet; that I wasn't ready to return. Why?

 "a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,"
~Eccl. 3:5b~

In my head it just didn't make sense. I knew what was awaiting me here. No job, but a holiday. And then a move to Ontario and university starting. I knew that I couldn't stay in Holland. But why was there then that strong urge to stay. To just get a job there, and go to uni there. Why did it feel like a magnet was pulling me to stay there.

I still haven't figured it out, and don't know if I ever will..

"Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
   but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails."

~Proverbs 19:21~ 

But all the same I look back at the 3 weeks in the Netherlands, as a wonderful experience, a growing time, a getting to know me adventure and a time in which I was questioned many times... THINK!!! -why I am here, what I think (6+ later) of moving to Canada, how I have dealt with it, how I live and what I like about it, what I don't, what I can change, what I have to lay at Jesus' feet because He can take care of it, He knows all things; how I have made some spur-of-the-moment decisions that have changed my life, some which are way past, but I still can't believe happened or that I handled it one or another way. THINK!!! - why/how/who/where/when!!

"Remember how the LORD your God led you
all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to
humble and test you in order to know
what was in your heart,
whether or not you would keep his commands."
~Deuteronomy 8:2~

Remember to think, to remember past and present and future, to live for God and not for me, to put Him first in all things, and not be what I want to be but what He wants me to be and become. Remember that He created me and has a wonderful plan for me, and that He knows what is best for me! :D

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future."
~Jeremiah 28:11~

Who wouldn't want to learn so many things within 3 weeks just because of what other people ask you...

It isn't that I have never thought about any of this before, but it just that I had to face so many walls with questions written on them... I had to stop and think, and had a lot of time to do just that.

"The LORD remembers us and will bless us:"
~Psalm 115:12~